Mario-isms

Things Mario says that are JUST WRONG(!) and their translations.

"I went to Gabe ... " (i.e. "I went to Gabe that he shouldn't push Andre away cuz he'll be sorry later!" or "I went to Brad about taking a day off."

Translation: "I said to Gabe..." or "I talked to Brad..."

"Ugh! I'm sick from my stomach!"

Translation: "Ugh! I'm sick to my stomach." (Though technically her way is probably more accurate.)

"Just to let you know..." (i.e. "Just to let you know, I'm a bitch.")

Translation: "Just so you know..."

This week I grew some balls and told Mario that she needed to pay attention to what she was writing. Of course I grew tiny ones so I actually just printed an e-mail she'd sent to someone and wrote "please pay attention to what you're writing" on it and laid it on her desk while she was at lunch.

When she came back she made me explain it to her. She's still convinced that she did it right and asked me to review it again. I tried to get her to understand that "the right words are there but they're in the wrong order." (Basically, she made a customer think we were sending the shirts they wanted when they were restocked but actually she was trying to convey that they needed to e-mail about what shirts they wanted.)

Last Friday Mario was a complete whore-bitch. People totally had my back when I told them about it later (of course it was so horribly bitchy that I've blocked it from my memory now). I decided then that I should call her Cunt-Whore because 1) It was appropriately mean enough for the cunt-whore she is!; 2) It makes me giggle.

SO - Henceforth - she shall be known as C.W. when she's a Cunt-Whore and simply Mario when she's not so bad.